"But I Enjoy It": When Pleasure Is the Last Argument

This thought arrives when the other justifications have been examined and set aside. It is not that bad. Well, maybe it is. It is not hurting anyone. Actually, it might be. You can stop anytime. But you have not. So what remains? Enjoyment. “I do it because I like it.”

And sometimes that is true. Pleasure is a legitimate feature of life, and not every enjoyable activity is a problem. But as a final argument for continuing a habit you have been questioning, “I enjoy it” deserves closer inspection.

The question underneath the question

The claim “I enjoy it” is doing two things at once. On the surface, it states a preference. Underneath, it implies a conclusion: if something is enjoyable, it should be continued.

But enjoyment and good judgment do not always align. You can enjoy something that is costing you more than it delivers. You can enjoy something less than you once did while wanting it just as much. And you can call something enjoyable when what you actually mean is that not doing it feels bad.

Wanting is not liking

The distinction between wanting and liking is one of the most important findings in the neuroscience of reward. Robinson and Berridge’s incentive-sensitization theory proposes that these are separate processes, driven by partially distinct brain systems [1]. Wanting (the motivational pull) is driven by dopamine pathways. Liking (the hedonic experience) is driven by a different, smaller set of brain structures.

With repeated use of addictive substances, the wanting system can become sensitized: the cues associated with the substance trigger increasingly intense motivation. But the liking system does not sensitize in the same way. The result is a growing gap between how much you want something and how much you enjoy it when you get it [2].

This is why people can describe a habit as enjoyable while simultaneously describing the experience of doing it as flat, disappointing or even unpleasant. The anticipation is vivid. The reality is ordinary. And by the time you notice, the next round of wanting has already begun.

A fictional example

The following is an illustrative example, not a real person’s story.

Megan scrolls social media for two to three hours every evening. When asked why, she says, “I enjoy it.” But when she pays attention to the actual experience, a different picture emerges.

• Before: She looks forward to it. The pull is strong, especially after a tiring day.
• During: She feels numb, mildly stimulated, occasionally irritated by what she sees.
• After: She feels groggy, vaguely guilty, and annoyed at the time lost.

Megan is not lying when she says she enjoys it. The anticipation feels like enjoyment. But the activity itself delivers something closer to anesthesia.

Hedonic adaptation

Even genuine pleasure fades with repetition. Research on hedonic adaptation describes how people adjust to both positive and negative experiences, returning toward a baseline over time [3]. The first drink of the evening is different from the fourth. The first cigarette after a break is different from the fifteenth of the day. The first episode of a show is different from the seventh hour.

For substances, a more specific process may be at work. Koob and Le Moal’s allostasis model proposes that repeated use shifts the hedonic set point downward, so that the substance is increasingly needed to reach a normal state rather than an elevated one [5]. What started as pleasure-seeking becomes discomfort-avoidance, but the person may still describe it as enjoyment because the alternative feels worse.

An honest audit of enjoyment

If “I enjoy it” is your last argument, test it:

1. Rate your enjoyment before, during and after. If before is consistently higher than during, wanting may be outrunning liking.
2. Compare this enjoyment with the first time. Has the pleasure diminished while the frequency has stayed the same or increased?
3. Notice what you call enjoyment. Is it pleasure, or is it relief from the discomfort of not doing it?
4. Consider the full cost. Enjoyment that comes with sleep loss, money spent, health consequences or strained relationships is enjoyment with a price tag. Is the net balance still positive?

A behavior that genuinely brings pleasure, causes no significant harm, and does not escalate does not need justification. A behavior that brings diminishing pleasure, costs more than it delivers, and requires increasingly elaborate arguments is not being sustained by enjoyment. It is being sustained by wanting, and “I enjoy it” is the last story standing.

For the thought that frames the habit as a reward for hard work, see “It’s a reward, not a problem”. For the version that locates the habit’s value in relaxation rather than pleasure, see “It’s the only thing that relaxes me”.

When to get more support. If you have noticed that you keep doing something you no longer truly enjoy, especially if the amounts have increased or the consequences have worsened, a conversation with your GP or a counselor can help. This pattern, continuing despite diminished pleasure, is one of the features clinicians look for. In the US, SAMHSA’s National Helpline (1-800-662-4357) offers free, confidential referral. In the UK, your GP can direct you to local services. If you are in distress, call or text 988 in the US, or contact Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland.